AGEING FRUIT IN THE HOT SUN

 

And so my first try at online Magnetic Poetry, at first glance I thought “Well, this is fun,” but I was wrong. A challenge of limitations.

 

 

Beat and blow
and bare away,

let not blood rip beauty black

We watch,
we want,

“I want hot peaches, honey,” you said

“No music for me,

no sun”

 

All Words by Damien B. Donnelly, limitations by Magnetic Poetry.

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19 thoughts on “AGEING FRUIT IN THE HOT SUN

    1. deuxiemepeau

      I found that out and nearly lost it but then I decided to arrange my words mid line if they needed to be shared! Cheating sometimes feels like winning 😜

      1. Jane Dougherty

        You can keep on adding more words until you get something close to what you want. It does feel like cheating, but given the very limited number of words on offer, my conscience can stand it 🙂

  1. merrildsmith

    It is sometimes frustrating, but it’s fun, too–especially when it works.
    I do what Jane says about and sometimes add extra words. But take out some words from the original list first and put them over on the side, if you want them, because they will vanish when the new words come. And sometimes the oracle just randomly eats the whole finished poem.
    A sacrifice to poetry, I suppose. 🙂

    1. deuxiemepeau

      Now I’m getting scared Merril!! An eating oracle is the basis of an entire poem in itself- you may have hit upon a new poetic theme!!!
      Thanks for the tips and best wishes from ‘novel editing central’ in Paris!!!
      Tomorrow I’m back to being a pattern maker after a two week holiday from the ‘other’ paying work!
      Time to juggle lives again 😃

      1. merrildsmith

        Good luck with the juggling. I’m not actually sure what a pattern maker is.
        I work as a freelance test writer, and I’m under contract to edit two reference books that I’m supposed to be working on now, but I really just want to write poems and stories. 🙂

      2. deuxiemepeau

        It’s so difficult to put your own personal work on hold, I write now while on the metro to work or in bed or early mornings!
        Good luck with your juggling too.
        I make patterns for a clothing brand. Work in fashion, designer gives me the design and I turn it into the finished product, making the shapes for the sleeves and collars and fronts and backs and fitting it until it’s good enough to be sold in the store!

      3. merrildsmith

        I thought that’s what the pattern making was, but I wasn’t quite sure. I sort of “collect” occupations to use in the test writing.

    1. deuxiemepeau

      Thanks Robin. It can be give or take with the words you get dealt. It’s like ketchup- sometimes you shake the bottle and you get nothing, other times everything comes at once. Have a go! Take care, Damien

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